in times like this... of sadness and confusion, I should remember this important fact:

I JUST DONT GIVE A FUCK.

bahahahahaha.

.....i've defected......

Soon.
Though I prefer it now.

One of them mention the end of a cycle, that was reasuring. No, not reasuring....just apropiated.
Still my throat is stucked/stacked with guilt.

But fuck it.
:D

This days have been good, really good. And I'm not going to let any-thing bring this down.


I have a desire and an idea.
I also believe I have time.
I should not get lost in the tangents.

I,I,I,I,I.

...and there is YOU.

 -----------------
Rats.
Pines.
Circles.
Amputations.
Imps.
 ---------------

Gotta stay quite now, and smile.






 






 
 

.

I should shut the fuck up now.

the word ''love'' gives me a boner.

Here some drawing I am doing with my friends Kamui and Diana.

Here a photo of Tome sleeping on my laptop!!!

 

 

I'm in the eriatarka.

Esta es.

''Sutured, contusion.
Beyond the anthills of the dawning of this plague.
Said I've lost my way.''

-Cicatriz E.S.P.

oh, yes.

to, to to, to, to-me

 :O

again

old shite.

Ok, here is some stuff I did while I was studying visual arts.
Ages ago :P

My first stop motion video, my first video ever really.
So bare with me on how crappt it is.



This one I did with a couple of friends, last project for that asignature.



I fucked up at some parts on the edition, the sound is crap...well I didnt have time to fix it, and I'll never will. buahahah!

//////

 

I wrote that with lipstick on the girls bathroom mirror, it was a letter to one of my sisters, if you wanna know what I wrotte there...just ask.

My writing skill are shit, so I'm guessing no one ever read that back then.

 

Final project for a crappy/useless drawing class.

Me putting down one of the many many rats I drew and set all over the city.

I'll put more things if I ever find those archives.

Green

I like you, very very much.

Even if I can't see it, I love to make you smile.

''We have a whole life to live together you fucker, but it can't start until you call.''

I have the blues.

Today I feel.....

Sad.
Lonely.
A stranger.
Bored.
Trapped.
Dumb.
....unconfortable.

Since I arrived this afternoon I have been feeling ......mmm, lets say *down* and Tome has been strangely kind to me, probably she is trying to keep me away from that uncalled misery state.
She hasn't moved from my side....when I lied on the bed, feeling completely lost and misplaced and she started patting my tummy.... I almost cried.
She is one beautiful cat.

Despite the new things I've been involved in, the friends I made, the people and things I am getting to know.....everything feels old....and inadecuate.
I still feel I don't belong anywhere around here, anywhere around this people.

I love my friends.
I love my family.

yeah.

 I am not a happy human.
 and I guess that is ok.

I wish someone completly strange and new could hold me now.
cuz' i feel sad and cold.

Am I delusional?
Am I in a dream?

Should I keep swallowing and lying and pretending.......
....how silly all the things in this world really are...

...silly silly, silly me.

I would gladly give everything I have, everything I am, for just a day with you.
Though, you, you are not here. You, you don't know who I am.
Only in dreams. Only in lies.

You are that special ghost. I don't want to lose this time.

I wish I could tell you how I feel, but the feeling is not real.
yes.

Have a nice day.





 

Do you recall my name?

Hello.
It has been a while.
Yes, I've been busy.

Yes, you in my mind. Fur in my mind.

So what has been going on here?

Store is up and running!
yay!
Is going to be a month next week or so since we opened it I think.

Here, some photos.

Yeah, looks pretty good.
Is small, but cozy.
:)
The store is what have been keeping me busy really.
We are for 4 people doing this project and I have to go there 3 times a week.
The project has been doing good so far, still I have to put more of myself into it, And come with ideas on how to reach the people we want to reach and take their money, buahahahaha!

oh oh oh, the store is called *Sopa de Gato* = *Cat soup* in spanish.

Here is why:




Dont be lazy and find the other parts there, is all there in youtube.

Basically we are collectors, we have been in this business a while. Bringing stuff from another countries for ourselves, books, cameras, music, rare shit from those crazy japanese bastards...yeah.
So we once tought we could also offer that here in our city. There is a lack in this sort of things here.
And cuz' we know what involves, we have the contacts troughout the world is easy for us to have at the store new and rare stuff.
I am more into see the store become a library, a rare one....you know, like me :P. But for now is more a miscellaneous sort of store, a strange little miscellaneous store.

:)

 oh oh oh.

here a drawing I did with Kamui ages ago, didnt remmber it existed until Diana found it.
Is based on a Moebius drawing.

Talking about that asshole Moebius that decided to die on us not more than a month ago (R.I.P. you fucking genius) I found this amazing stuff.

They are collectors cards that Moebius put out in 1993 featuring his art and his characters.
So FUCKING COOL!!!!
And I have all 90 of them.
:D




I'll writte a bit more later. now my mind is blank.
 

I was in an action movie, actually not being passive but rather the crazy as jason statham protagonist type.
bahahahahha!

I'll write my dreams when I wake up.

...oh, by the way stranger, store is looking.....sooooo good!

I'm working on that up there.
Havent draw much really, no time.
And yes, I gotta stop craving for the imagos.

Been, working on issues for the store we still have to solve.
MAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! I feel tired.

man, I need to sleep.

Cheesy McTits.

A naked monkey is eating a concrete cube.
I am eating cinamon cocaine candies.

On my wall, you without a face, ghostly paper.

Oh well, my fingers and brain cant compute Sir.

yeah......

.........So.

Store is almost up, few details here and there still left to define.
But I am almost there, and I can not give much of a fuck.






No more of this and no more of that, I am left with what is caught betwixt.
Sadly I couldnt create any saddles and turn her into my mule.
Ghostly pale images; I feel like a child that has only imaginary friends.

I really wonder how would I look with some antlers on my head, preferably some black/red ones.
Yeah, I need to grow some, maybe plant some antler seeds on my head. Yes! that is definetly such a good idea.


I had a dream a couple of days ago, me infront of a mirror.
I craked up into two pieces, left blue, right red.
Worms instead of organs, but the worms didnt function like organs.
I also dreamt that I was fighting with my friends.

I really want to see her again in my dreams, some time soon.
This days I'll be eating triangles.





oh yeah, here is Limon being cute.

pretty pretty, eriatarka

Wait for me wherever you are, I'm still looking for you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1R7pub3BEI&feature=player_embedded






I go now.

tripichipi pipi olipi flipi

I was doing some modification to a wooden desk this morning, accidentaly I cutted the seventh finger on my right hand.
....now I only have 6 fingers left there.

I found this potato inside the desk; now, is my current lover, and I am my own amputated god.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CEuuH6K3rp4









I still don't understand, and I'm still pretending I'm going somewhere with the actions I take.
Delusional and apathetic.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PfH4UYk0qh4







When I die, I hope beetle larvae will eat my decaying flesh.

I think I mistook the nods for an approval, once again.

There is a small turtle eating the carpet on my room's floor.
Shu shu! nobody''s two headed green pet.
There is a child skull on top of the turtle, the words *help, shadow, mirror* written on its surface.

I might need to buy a new anima soon, for sure.

Can I borrow yours?
For it, I would give you most of my unreachable desires.





http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qNFQPWgqr2s

=O_o=

Tome is fat, bahahahahah!

skulls & leafs
paper & cats
cigarrettes & slugs
flags & cells
arrows & stars
lids & snakes.

You & I.
But I is no here, and you, are still complaining.

one eye on each palm.
..and tonight I am goimg to dream of 2 headed fairies.

Crooked teeth beneath your sight, the larvae is inside me.
This makes no sense.

I want to wake up while someone is choking me.
How fucked up could that be.
oh yeah, it can be that crazy lady from À l'intérieur. I'm pretty sure I'll be shitting my pants as soon as I see her on top of me, with her hands on my neck.
.............

Also, maybe I should start planning a trip to europe.
I should plan a lot of things.





Limon & Tome.



=^_^=

So yeah, I need to start making myself wake up early.
I don't need to sleep that much really.
I just need to dream at night, not to sleep.
Doctor said otherwise, yeah.

I need to do a lot of things really.

Would you keep me company?


http://www.goear.com/listen/667e667/caresse-song-psychic-tv

--------
Are you going to eat that?
-Not yet my friend. It's still warm, and my tongue does not like the current temperature.
Ok, I'm just going to play here for a bit, just tell me when is ready to put my finger in.
-Sure my friend. Go and play with the scarabs for a bit.

So thats the only bit I could extract from the conversation I heard on a dream that didn't happened.

this 2 kids, though one talked more like a man than a kid. The other one did have a kid attitude.
Anthropomorphic kid shaped amphibians. frogish (sssshhh) I might say. blue and orange....just like my favorite colour for m&m's.
I was not in my room, and I was not alone.
shadowish female figures were all around me, arranged like the furniture that it was supposed to be there.
Even the bed was made of them.
And I was naked, and my hands and arms were blue, my penis was red.

Oral sex is definetly the key for that dream.
But I'll think about that some other day.

Again, I am pretty sure it never happened.

Yeah.

so what?

So, here I am.
With a fart stuck inside. I bet soon is gonna reach my brain.

Aberilunka is reaching every single goddess particle that compose the yummi nutella.
oh man, so freaking yummi.
...but if I eat even a bit more of that brownish delightfull substance, I'll probably die.
or maybe I wont die, the fart stuck inside will just explode, melting my entrails into disgusting crimson juice.....and then, I'll probably die.

Do I care if I die?

I would certainly care if I knew I was going to die.
Cant care that much afterwards right?

Man that fart!.
.
..
...
....
.....
......20 mins later.....I just delivered a baby.

bahahahhaah, yeah. I'm a nasty fuck.


So, I was trying to look for the moon tonight, but just like last night, that bitch was hidding from me.
Still I told her what I wanted. once again.

Om ñom ñom ñom, thats all I understood from the snake eating its tail.

did you know that the craters on the moon form a rabbit shape on her surface. its pretty recognizable if you just stare at it for a bit.
Yes sir, a rabbit on the moon, since a I can remenber I cant never look at the moon without seeing that tricky greyish rabbit.

So anyways, that drawing up there was made for a girl I once met through the internets, flickr to be more precisely.
Well, I cant say that I'm using the full meaning of the word *meeting*, cuz I have never seen her in person. But since the begining I always felt some sort of awkward attraction to her.
To what I can perceive through her art really; and to what my mind tricks me to believe.
though the fact that she is physically beatiful might have something to do with....whatever.

I really like her, I do.

I use her photos as reference a lot.
man! What the fuck.
Is a pretty strange feelling the one I get every time I look at her pictures, or when I read her words.
I get a feeling of.....well I cant make you feel what I fell, for that you need to be me, but I can say that I end up pretty much thinking or saying *thank you for the word/photo/drawing I just saw, it has made my day better*

I would love to lick her precious mind.

:O

In a change of topic and weather, I lost the magic whisker Limon gave me a while back.
It was all cut in half from the time he got completly shaved...but Im sure it was still usefull.

:(

I hope he will gift me a new one soon.


I will start writting some sort of tale or story soon.
that could be fun.
...or maybe not.

Girl

I love who you are.

I need to organize my time.

Entonces, aqui estoy.
Mi creatividad fue devorada por mi propia alma.

Todo se ve de mal gusto. Y lo que estoy haciendo ahora no me agrada.
Maldita sea!